Monday, December 27, 2010

BANGK(zero)K Art and Music Festival

The days have melded into nights which have turned into days, over and over and over again for the past week. Until now. The first annual Bangkok Zero Art and Music Festival has just ended. I've been documenting the whole experience as the official photographer of the festival, having the privilege of meeting fantastic artists- musicians, dancers, painters, videographers, performance artists, photographers- from around the world. I learned such priceless information, expanded my mind to ideas never thought, and somehow created a slight plan of action concerning who I'm going to be when I grow up. Or maybe realizing who I've grown up to be...
Regardless of such frivalties, my portfolio is slowly building. And I have never been more satisfied with the work I am doing. I have many, many, many things to learn, but I'm loving every minute of it.
Here are some shots of the festival. I hope you enjoy!

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

It's The Little Things

Every now and again, it hits us. We are tiny. We are tiny segments of reality only perceivable to those few and far between. To those who perceive us and those whom we perceive we are each affected to degrees never imaginable without the actual experience.
I considered what would happen if I gave the same care and consideration to every form of matter around me. This led me to have countless crazy dreams both unsettling and unwelcome, but appreciated none-the-less. It was because of these dreams that I awoke, once again, at the crack of dawn to grab my camera and go for a little walk. I admired all the colors and snapped away filling my imagination with the stories of people and reasons for the existence each scene. With that I created this: 

A small photo album of what exists beneath my feet, with the one exception of wires hanging over my head, which I rarely take the time to admire. The point of all it being, enjoy the little things. Every last one of them.

Do me a favor and kiss the one you love today. Or hug, or compliment or simply appreciate them. I wish I could do the same for all of you. Aside the appreciating. That's done and done.

ani difranco - studying stones

I am out here studying stones
Trying to learn to be less alive
Using all of my will
To keep very still
Still even on the inside
I've cut all of the pertinent wires
So my eyes can't make that connection
I am holding my breath
I am feigning my death
When I'm looking in your direction

'Course numb is an old hat
Old as my oldest memories
See that one's my mother
And that one's my father
And that one in the hat, that's me
It's a skill I'd hoped to abandon
When I got out on the open road
But any more pent up emotion
And I think I'm gonna explode

There's never been an endeavor so strange
As trying to slow the blood in my veins
To keep my face blank
As a stone that just sank
Until not a ripple remains
I am high above the tree line
Sitting cross legged on the ground
When all of the forbidden fruit has fallen and rotted
That's when I'm gonna come down

'Course numb is an old hat
Old as my oldest memories
See that one's my mother
And that one's my father
And that one in the hat, that's me
It's a skill I'd hoped to abandon
When I got out on the open road
But any more pent up emotion
And I think I'm gonna explode

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

A Bit of a Giggle

Do you remember how I wrote about pretending to be sick in Amman so that I could stay in Jordan for a bit (for free) and how the guy behind the counter was really sweet and gave me cigs, coffee and chat, but the change would cost too much, so I didn't take it....? 
Well.... apparently I made quite the impression. Because, that guy, at the airline, just friend requested me on Facebook. I thought it was someone else, so I accepted. Then he sent me a chat on Facebook informing me who he was and that he had read my blog... and it make him laugh. 

Hahaha- completely busted... lol, goodness..


Good Morning Bangkok

I awoke at 6am to a knock on the door. For once, I actually fell asleep when desired and not when I had no other choice as the result of one too many drinks. By 6, I was fresh. I was ready. I had actually hoped to wake by this time although- I was imagining springing out of bed bright-eyed and bushy tailed, ready to take on my never ending list of tasks- a knock on the door would suffice. It was Trix; a friend from my previous visit to the lovely abode in which I dwell in, again.
“Uh huh,” I groggily replied. “What time is it?”
“about 6….”
He sat on the edge of my mattress rolling up and asking all the questions I had promised myself I wouldn’t answer. I did, however, and the conversation led to a reminderance that I had a list. A to do list, that I was more than happy to tackle. After a couple of smokes and a Suicide Girls video, I tore off the tag to my sports bra (bought 2 months prior) and put on my running shoes (which hadn’t been worn for well over 3 years) and declared that I was going for a run- a task on my list. This was my first run in ages, but I needed to begin somewhere. Trix said he wanted to join, so after one more smoke we were off- with a heart full of intentions and a body that was not impressed.
Upon returning I attempted to be productive. Sat in front of my computer, pulled up some links, uploaded some photos and listened to music, when my second visitor of the morning quietly opened the door. I looked up slightly and said hello. Silence followed. I stopped what I was doing and glanced up, back down and up again. It took a few seconds for my mind to process what was going on, when suddenly I realized it was Jan. One of the most beautiful people I have ever met. He was here, standing in my doorway, at 8:30 in the morning. I immediately jumped up and wrapped my arms around him laughing and spouting questions like a 12-year-old girl.
I met Jan on my 25th birthday in North Goa. It was an amazing day. Prior to then I was feeling ill and staying in Delhi. I decided that if I were to be sick on my birthday, I may as well be sick by the beach. So, I booked a flight, hopped on a plane and arrived at a small hostel in Anjuna named Evershine. By pure coincidence another traveler I had met in Koh Phi Phi, 9 months prior, was staying at the same hostel! Via facebook, he was aware it was my birthday as well as my obsession with oceans.  Thus he organized a dinner directly on the shore with a handful of guests who were sharing the dorms with us.
As soon as I saw the ocean, I stripped off my dress and went running into the sea. Jan joined me and the two of us laughed and dove into as many waves as we could before settling back at the dinner table, dripping wet and smiling. After this, the two of us rented a motorbike and set out for the beaches along the Southern shoreline of the Arabian Sea. Needless to say our time together was amazing, however, short lived. His visa expired 10 days after meeting and I was, once again, saying goodbye to someone who had changed my life for the better.
We kept in touch via email and, by pure chance, realized we would both be in Bangkok at the same time, for a total of 24 hours. And here he was, standing in my doorway. We spent the day chatting about dreams, hopes, aspirations, places we’ve seen, places we hope to see, and everything in between. It was lovely. 
I said goodbye to him yesterday. And for the first time in a long while, I cried. Not dramatically, I simply excused myself, walked into the bathroom, broke down, regrouped and came back dry eyed with a not-to-convincing smile on my lips. That’s the thing about traveling. You are constantly experiencing the most wonderful moments, meeting the most wonderful people and seeing some breath-taking sights but, no matter what, you must always say goodbye to each and every one of them. 

It was refreshing and painful simultaneously. I would never trade the moments and memories I have collected, though I look forward to the day when the weeks, months and years provide the same faces, scenes and surroundings day in and day out. 

song of the day:      Goodbye by Puerto Muerto

1:Jan, attempting to see the world from an alternate perspective (Palolem, Goa, India)
2. Taking a break from the bike (Anjuna, Goa, India)

Saturday, December 4, 2010


It seems I have been running forever. From one job to the next; one city to the next; one life to the next... From an outsiders perspective, this may still seem the case, and to an extent, I suppose they're right. But what a lot of people misunderstand is that I'm running towards something, not away.
Yesterday, 1pm GMT, I arrived at London's Heathrow Airport, in an effort to flee the snow and ice. (Hmmm... guess i am running away from some things... :) I attempted to watch some recent films and ended up sleeping most of the way to Amman. Here, I had a connecting flight to Bangkok but being as I'd never visited Jordan, I feigned a stomach bug to see if I could 'rest' for a few days until boarding my connecting flight. It was working to the extent the men of the airline offered me cigarettes, coffee and a place to chat in their private offices, but when it came down to the ticket, the penalty was more than I could afford. Thus, I boarded my 4th or 5th flight to Thailand and happily took the window seat next to this adoringly sweet Chinese woman. After fighting sleep for hours on end, I decided to peak through the shades the stewardess' had drawn and was simply amazed by the colors that soared in through the Plexiglas. The plane was flying North East over Dubai and countless mountains were creating shadows over endless valleys as the sky changed from Navy to Pink, Orange and Sky, to a blinding White. It was breathtaking. What I hope to never forget was the battleship-game-sea directly before the sun rose. The Arabian Sea was streaked with all these tiny rectangular boxes of light. Remember the game Battleship, as a kid? It was exactly like that, but real. And full of color. Full of life.
With this image in mind, I slept soundly until the woman next to me was leaning on my lap with both palms trying to catch a glimpse of the world from 3000 feet above. I gladly switched seats with her relishing in the fact that someone else shared my joy of the unseen.
What followed was a 7 hour feat from the airport to my hostel, which should only take 45 minutes. Naturally, though, it was the King of Thailand's birthday, so my journey was extended quite a bit, from one end of town to the next.As I browsed Thai script trying to make my way I became increasingly thankful for the universal symbols that are numbers. 4 buses later I am here. And for the first time in a long while, I have my own door to close, my own time to follow and a party I can join downstairs if I please.
Though, I think I'm going to stay locked away for now. The goal at the moment is to create. Play some chords, edit some visions and find how my little life can be productive, significant and of value.... head above the clouds with feet planted firmly on the ground.